READ ABOUT HOW TO RAISE CHILDREN OR GO SEE GRANDMA? WHAT CAUSES MORE CONFUSION ABOUT RAISING CHILDREN?
Apparently, today children don’t just grow up. They grow up according to a plan. According to precise questions, such as: what does the child want to tell me with his behaviour at night? What are normal stages of development and at which moment? Is my son normal? It seems that insecurity constantlygrows. And it's something that makes me nervous.
My wife was already reading books full of recommendations during pregnancy. This I understand: you couldn't exactly see what was going on. OK, I admit it: we don't know much either about what a new-born is thinking about. But let's be honest: it's not complicated. Hungry? Cold? Hot? Tired?
We can get by even without reading a stack of books
With regards to the theme of children and babies, my position is "We’ll learn anyway, we'll get it" and this often encounters incomprehension. Because of their reading, many parents think they know everything and they get each other going with their half-knowledge.
Whatever happened to good old instinct?
Perhaps the many books with advice for parents have removed it from their DNA? I don't need any book to prove that my son is absolutely normal. And then what's normal? My God! Now I sound like my mother.
Speaking of mother and grandmother. She came to visit us. My wife and my mother chat woman to woman. They talk readily, for example, about the birth. A theme that outsiders cannot and should not comment on, let alone judge. But they talk about other things anyway as if I’m not there.
"... and he only started walking at 18 months. And he didn’t turn over for an eternity. He was really late developing. But with four children I certainly couldn't go to the doctor every day."
Really! This wisdom does not help anyone
Grandma prepares lunch. "Please make something that can be blended for baby food, okay?" Asks my wife.
Mmm, the smell is already good. A look in the kitchen. Grandma is preparing cabbage rolls. Cabbage? But doesn’t that cause meteorism in babies? And therefore, a sleepless night for us? I ask my wife. She doesn’t exactly jump with joy on hearing that it’s cabbage. Grandma replies "They’re are all stories! They only get stomach aches if they are hungry".
OK. A different generation, I guess. I ponder for a moment; how can I answer that? My wife is already a taking a book from the shelf. She reads aloud a seemingly logical connection between food and colic. Amazing. You can't just find out empirically what is good for your baby? But if this stops Grandma, go ahead!
As a man, I am interested in solutions and avoiding quarrels
I watch my wife with a complicit eye: I’m sure I have an ace up my sleeve that will restore harmony. "You know what? No discussion. We’ll enjoy lunch and will give the baby a jar of Sun Baby. He loves it.”
Transgenerational contentmentwith grandma and with the advice book.